Date - 08/16/2006
Location - LAX
Snoop McSneak's Eavesdropper's Account of the conversation that took place between a recently divorces Kate Hudson and Old Divorcee Jennifer Aniston.
Jen - Hey Kate, I heard about your divorce. How are ya holding up.
Kate - Oh I’m cool. It wasn’t like unexpected or anything so I was kinda prepared for it.
Jen - Now Kate, that’s the last thing you want to say in public. Girl you gotta act like you were blind sided by it.
Kate - What do you mean?Jen - Pity Party, girl. You do not mess with the power of the Pity Party. Look at me, after 3 bombs I’m still in the news.
Kate - uhhh…..about that, aren’t you a little embarrassed? Do you know people are laughing at you?
Jen - What do you mean?
Kate - I mean, it was obvious your marriage was failing, yet you pretend like it came out of nowhere. It seems a little childish. Look at me, I’m 27yrs old with a Kid and I’d never stoop to that level. I have too much class for that.
Jen - (pointing finger) Are you calling me classless...Bitch?
Kate - Whatever Jen, Whatever. You need to chill out with the pity party.(To her friend)Come on let’s get outta here before someone takes my picture with this whiny woman….girl. Jeez, why couldn’t I have run into Angelina Jolie at the airport? Now that will elevate my status.
Jen - (Screaming) what did you say? Do you know who I am? I am America’s Sweetheart! Americaaaa’s Sweethearrrrrrrrrrrrrrt!
Jen - (Screaming) what did you say? Do you know who I am? I am America’s Sweetheart! Americaaaa’s Sweethearrrrrrrrrrrrrrt!
Kate - Jesus, she has lost it. Quick let’s get outta here.
Another Scenario
Jen – Hey Kate, I heard about your divorces. How are you holding up?
Kate – oh I’m cool. Oh I’m cool. It wasn’t like unexpected or anything so I was kinda prepared for it.
Jen – Now Kate, you listen to me…if you need any help on how to handle this with class, just call me.
Kate – Yeah…okay.
Jen – Because I know how to handle things…all my fans says so.
Kate – Hun…yeah, You’re definitely a class act.
Jen – I know. Alright give me a hug. *thinking to self* I sure hope the razzis get”
Kate – Oh…okay. *thinking to self* God, I hope the razzis don’t get this*
Jen – Bye love. Call me. (Jen Leaves)
Friend - What? Classy Lady? Are you kidding me?
Kate - Shuush….let’s just get outta here.
Friend - Okay, but you better start talking. What do you mean class act?
Kate - Don’t you get it? I had to say it or we’ll have an airport blow up on our hands
.Friend - What do you mean?
Kate - Helloooooo, haven’t you been paying attention? Jen is an insecure woman, who needs to be validated and if she doesn’t get it, she’s gonna whine. Remember the incident with Kimberly Stewart?
Friend - Who?
Kate – Exactly! Some nobody calls her homely and she was a nervous wreck. I’ve got my own problems; I don’t want to add the problems of a 37yrs old woman to mine. So I threw her a bone just so we’ll get rid of her.
Friend - Ahhh, I see. I was worried there for a sec.
Kate - Puh-lease, the last thing she is, is classy.
(Suddenly they hear a loud scream)
Jen - How dare you say you want to search me? Do you think I’m Al Queda? I am Americaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Sweetheaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaart.
Kate - Jesus, she’s lost it. Quick let’s get outta here before someone sees us.
